Isolation From an Abuser

If you have been in an abusive relationship, you have most likely been isolated from friends and family at some point.

For me, it started happening very early on. Two days in, to be exact. Clearly, I didn’t understand what was going on or I would have hightailed it out of there (if only)! Here are some examples of what that isolation looked like for me:

-getting angry if I made plans with anyone but them (this looked like leaving events without saying bye to me, ignoring me, etc)

-turning me against friends or family (telling me they’re two-faced, that they’re jealous of our relationship, etc)

-convincing me to move to another town away from my friends, the gym I attended, my son’s dad (with whom I co-parent closely)

-monitoring my interactions with my son’s dad and making sure I didn’t see him or have conversations with him which my abuser did not have access to

-convincing me that I shouldn’t visit my family in Indiana (I still went, just considerably less that I would have without them)

Over time experiencing these tactics and more, you find yourself more and more isolated. You spend more time at home than you ever have and you have less and less people to turn to for support. You’re now depending on one person for support, validation, love, entertainment, physical needs, and more. And that person is abusing you.